As Emma undressed for bed, the husband (who was a burly bruiser) tossed his pants to his bride and said, "Here, put these on."

She put them on and the waist was twice the size of her body.

"I can't wear your pants", she said.

"That's right!", said the husband, "and don't you ever forget it. I'm the man who wears the pants in this family!"

With that, she flipped him her panties and said, "Try these on."

He tried them on, and found he could only get them on as far as his kneecap. He said, "Hell, I can't get into your panties!"

She said, "That's right and that's the way it's going to be until your goddamned attitude changes!"